hannaH and i.
we went to the rodeo.
we looked real good. in our boots and wranglers.

but were miserable. so very miserable.
we were not cut out to be cowgirls.
but you'd never know.

when i get home.

i.
i want to fly.
i want to fly away.
i want to soar.
i want to soar above the clouds.
i.
i want to sing.
i want to sing a song.
i want to belt.
i want to belt a ballad for you.
i.
i want to be.
i want to be with you.
i want to hear.
i want to hear you sing.
i.
i want to feel.
i want to feel you around me.
i want to touch.
i want to touch your face.
i.
i will fly.
i will soar.
i will sing.
i will belt.
i will feel.
i will touch.

when i get home.
when you come home.
please. come home. to me.

tell me why.

why do the most unforunate things happen to the least deserving people?
why does he have to leave his wife and two boys behind? why do his little boys have to grow up without their father? why did it come back? why was it more aggressive? why did they tell him he was cured?
why did her baby have to leave this earth so soon? why did they not get a chance to meet him? why does he have to remain an only child? why did she have to be left feeling so empty?
why did he have to leave? why did his family have to suffer? why wasn't i in that car with them? why does it seem like he is still here, even though it has almost been a year?
why do i have so much, and they have so little? why do i have an education i take for grantid, and they have none, but want it more than anything? why do i have immunizations, shots, and pills, when they don't have clean water?
why did he walk out on his family for something "better"? why does she have to be the one that is hurting? why can't he see what he did wrong?
why can't the world be a brighter place? with no pain, sorrow, or suffering?
why can't we all change, the past, present, and future?

because.

do you want to know a secret.

my heart is far away from me.
i wish it was here with me.

to avoid feeling numb,
i sent it away.
will you keep it close?
will you keep it safe?

i got something in return.
it was your heart.
your feelings, your understanding.
i will keep it close.
i will keep it safe.

and when you return
we will make the exchange.
and perhaps sew the hearts together.
to avoid feeling numb.